Wednesday, May 13, 2009

My Socks Are Long Gone

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom can be no variation, neither shadow that is cast by turning. - James 1:17

Do you ever outgrow that need to check them after they've slept for awhile?

Every single night since this little boy has entered into our lives, I sneak into his room after he's fallen asleep to just stare. And be in awe. And spend some one-in-one time with my Heavenly Father. This is where He draws me close to Him every evening. This...this is where I find myself the most comforted, the most humbled, the most encouraged in His presence...watching my son sleep.

I've been a firm believer that sometimes God relishes in our not expecting a specific blessing. For a long time, I had given up the dream of ever having a child, let alone a biological child. So I think our Heavenly Father took a special joy in handing us a gift that would totally blow our socks off. I'd like to think that he enjoyed handing to me such a funny, silly, ornery, excitable, active, chatterbox of a boy. It was more than I ever, ever expected!

So while I'm challenged with fears about adding another child to the mix, there is that part of me that is giddy with anticipation over what's to come. I'm sure it will be hard. I'm sure we'll be sleep deprived, overwhelmed and at times wonder whether or not we're going to get through the day. But I also know that in the mix of it all, we will be standing in awe over God's love and willingness to bless...just because He CAN.

I hope in those moments, that we remember that it truly is HIM that gives every good and perfect gift...that these children are not "ours", but His.

1 comment:

The Mills Gang said...

I'm speechless---perfectly said.